Please, someone put The Hitman's Bodyguard out of its misery

I've only walked out of 3 movies in my life: Cujo, Mission Impossible 2 and, this weekend, The Hitman's Bodyguard.

I just couldn't take it anymore: after 75 minutes of stereotypical, juvenile stretches of logic, I had to leave.

(Note: I walked into this movie cold: no reviews, no trailers, no knowledge. I was invited and someone else paid for the ticket.)

Selma Hayek in The Hitman's Bodyguard

Heist Love: Headhunters (2011) - Aksel Hennie, Nikolaj Coster-Waldau

The Norwegian film Headhunters, with Aksel Hennie and Nikolaj Coster-Waldau, is probably the best heist film I have seen in a long time. Aksel Hennie is a well-known Norwegian actor, director and producer, while Nikolaj Coster-Waldau is most well-known as Jamie Lannister from Game of Thrones.

My sister and I love to watch heist movies. And this one didn't disappoint. Full of goony characters and slick art thefts, this movie kept me guessing until nearly the end.

Roger Brown (Aksel Hennie) is a headhunter at one of the top agencies in Norway. But he has a short-man complex and a very tall and beautiful Norwegian wife whom he doesn't quite feel worthy of. So he over-compensates by spending astronomical amounts of money on homes, jewelry and an art gallery for her. So he has to subsidize his salary by stealing art.

He has a spectacular system going by scoping out possible heists by interviewing targets as clients. Then at his wife's art gallery opening he meets the taller, better-looking, more successful Clas Greev (Nikolaj Coster-Waldau). He finds out from his wife that Clas owns a Ruben and also happens to be looking for a new job. So Roger decides he has to interview him as his next target.

And that's just the beginning.

Warning: it has subtitles. But even if you are averse to reading your movies don't let that keep you away. It's worth every word.

Ironic Man - Robert Downey, Jr. (2010)

Just got home from the highly anticipated Iron Man 2 with the much admired Robert Downey, Jr.

I was entertained.

I laughed, I got hopped during the computer scenes, I got kinda excited during the action scenes--kinda, 'cause I am not into fighting.

But there were a couple of snafus:

1. Why are Scarlet Johansson and Gwyneth Paltrow wearing such high heels that they are walking like geisha girls?
2. If Iron Man's nemesis is whipping electricity in water, why doesn't he get electrocuted?
3. If the metroplex's phone systems and cell systems went entirely down, how could Gwyneth make a phone call?

Oh, but it didn't bother me that much. The witty, ironic repartee between the characters made it worthwhile, delivering their lines with tongues firmly planted in cheeks.

Ok, honestly, Robert Downey, Jr., made it worthwhile.